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» Sexual humor /jokes » Mirror mirror...
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cornhuskers1970
Member
Posts: 16
Registered: 04-28-2020 Location: Omaha Nebraska
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posted on 07-13-2020 at 20:58 |
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Mirror mirror...
A woman was shopping at a very old antiques store. She noticed a beautiful floor mirror and the dealer informed her in a confidential voice, "It's a magic mirror."
"A magic mirror?" she questioned suspiciously.
"It gives each person who says the secret incantation two wishes," he assured.
She was intrigued and agreed to buy, but only if the mirror proved it's magic.
Following the dealer's instruction, she stepped back so her reflection appeared fully on the glass, and said, "Mirror mirror on the floor, I wish for ruby slippers like Dorthy wore!"
Incredibly, a dazzling pair of ruby slippers appeared beside her feet.
"Sold!" she shouted excitedly. She hugged the old dealer and arranged for delivery immediately.
She had the mirror placed in a corner of her bedroom, stood back, and spoke her second wish, "Mirror mirror on the floor, make my breasts size forty-four!" And without hesitation, the wish was granted. Her breasts grew to pop the buttons of her blouse. She couldn't believe it! Tearing off her blouse altogether, she grabbed her melon-sized knockers and squeeled delightedly. "All my life I've wanted these and now they're mine!"
She dressed in the largest blouse she owned. She unbuttoned the top two and spread the blouse open for her vuluptuous tits and cleavage to show brazenly. "Oh my husband is going to love these. I can't wait until he comes through the front door!"
And when he did, his response was exactly what she'd imagined. He was ecstatic, pulling her close to examine them with both hands.
"I wonder what that mirror can do for me?" he asked, and nearly squeeled like a little girl when she responded sexily, "Why don't we find out, big boy..."
Taking him upstairs, she told him the incantation, stood him fully before the glass, and said, "Now Glen, I don't want to make you angry, but you've always been a little bit...small for me." She looked down at his crotch. "Maybe just a little bigger? For me?"
But Glen wanted to make history. In his mind he saw himself being oogled over by beautiful, naked porn starlets. He saw his future change and thought, with a little guilt, that being the largest man on the planet would enable him to escape his wife forever. He would become rich. He would be known to everyone, man and woman alike.
"You have to be sincere, darling," she said. "The antique dealer told me so just as I left the store.
"I'm sincere, baby," he smiled.
"Really, it's like a curse or something if you wish for something bad."
"It's all good, my dear," he assured, unzipping his trousers.
"I love you darling," she said, fighting back tears of emotion. "I've never loved you more than right now."
"Yeah yeah, don't turn on the waterworks." He looked his reflection directly in the eyes. "Mirror mirror on the floor," he shouted, "MAKE MY DICK TOUCH THE FLOOR!!!"
And his legs fell off.
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